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「Anonymous」Chapter 7
Chapter 7
“How’s the office?”
“It’s been rather empty today. Every other employee is running errands, not in their desk, talking, making coffee,” Masaki described, maneuvering his phone on his shoulder as he served himself a cup of the hot beverage. “The usual.”
“What about you?” Aiba could hear Matsumoto’s smirk through the line.
“Guess I’m not up to much, but…. I think I may have a shot with that client I told you about earlier.”
“You really think so?”
“I just might. It’ll be perfect if I could have this one thing, but I shouldn’t get my hopes up.”
“What do you mean? You totally deserve this.”
Aiba drank a sip of his coffee. “Things don’t usually work out that easily for me.” There was a brief pause before either of them spoke. “Why are we talking about me again? I called to ask about you! How is everything? Is your mother any better?”
“She is! Thankfully, the surgery went smoothly, and she’s been recovering quickly. The doctor’s been praising her all morning for getting through with it. She gave us quite a scare but… everything worked out for the best.”
The relief in Jun’s voice was more than evident and it brought a smile to Masaki’s lips. “I’m glad, honestly. And… I’m sorry I didn’t contact you sooner. I didn’t want to interfere,”
“You don’t even have to mention it. What you did back in the office… Where do I even start to thank you?”
“Ah, that was nothing.”
“Are you kidding? You saved my job! Seriously, I don’t know where I’d be without your help.” Aiba was thankful Jun couldn’t hear the blush the latter’s words provoked. “I wish I could thank you properly, but it’ll take me some days to catch up with work and Sakurai won’t forgive me for it.”
“I understand. You should take it easy for now. There’s no need to rush it.”
“Guess we’ll have to post-pone those drinks again.” Jun sighed into the phone, the exhaustion clear in his voice. After a possibly sleepless night still he had the energy to dwell on something so trivial, yet Aiba found his reminder rather cute.
“Yeah…”
“How’s your schedule looking for now? I don’t suppose… I got you into any trouble with the director or… am I wrong?”
“Oh, no, it’s fine. You could say… I sort of talked it out with him.”
“Really?” Jun seemed genuinely surprised. “Was he mad?”
“I’m… not really sure. We didn’t talk much about it after I explained,”
“Then… what did you talk about?”
Aiba realize it was not the time to get into details and decided to look over Jun’s curiosity. “I explained myself the best I could, and he seemed to accept it, eventually.”
“And… how is he looking today?”
Aiba had to peek outside the break room and briefly glance at the director’s office. “Definitely not in a good mood after this morning’s news. They’re saying the Murakami Corporation went bankrupt.” Aiba whispered into his phone.
“The law-firm?”
“There’ve been talks all day about cutting ties with us. The director’s been stuck in meetings all morning and management is probably a war zone. It’s one of our most loyal clients! I can’t think of the measures they must be planning to make up for this. It’s going to leave a mark on us, for sure.”
“Damn it, I wish I was there. This is the worst timing!”
“On the bright side, since Sakurai’s been on his toes, he doesn’t have time to ask if you’ve showed up already or not. If anything, it’s the right timing.”
“But I want to be of some help! Be there when they make rounds and pass out the work. Help you when they decide to dump everything on you,”
Aiba laughed, flattered by his thoughtfulness and humor regardless of all they’ve been through in recent days. And Aiba was more than thankful that he’d always made the unconscious attempt to make him smile every time.
A pair of footsteps entered the room just then, catching Aiba’s glance, who instantly hid his phone from the secretary’s prowling eyes. “Jun, I got to go now. Sorry!” Aiba whispered his last words with little success to fool the other who started working on the coffee machine.
With much regret, Aiba had hung up mid-sentence and put down his phone, trying to put his outmost attention and energy into drinking his last sips of coffee.
Much like the director and the rest of the employees, Ohno didn’t look his best. Aiba could tell by the degree Ohno’s shoulders slumped that it was his third run of Sakurai’s not-so-special coffee. As he prepared it almost by instinct, Ohno made no attempt to provide any of his attention to Aiba, probably distracted by the last complaint he had to hear from Sakurai, judging by the heaviness of his eyebags and a prominent pout on his lips. Meanwhile Aiba drank his coffee quietly, determined to return to his desk as soon as possible.
Ohno sighed heavily, bringing attention upon himself. “You’re not supposed to be making personal calls during office hours.” He suddenly said, taking Aiba by surprise.
The latter set down his cup before he addressed Ohno. “I-I’m very sorry, sir. It won’t happen again.”
“Isn’t that what you told the director last time?” Ohno asked, his gaze set on the pouring coffee while his mind wandered elsewhere.
It took Aiba a little over a moment to realize what Ohno suggested and even more to catch the tone in which Ohno spoke to him as he stood there, silently, and completely unarmed.
“It may be none of my business but standing in for a new employee and making promises you barely even follow is rather irresponsible,” said Ohno. Masaki gulped harshly, his response, nothing but silence. “Whose fault would it be if things pile up?” Masaki tried uttering words, but his thoughts came all at once. “And I suppose this familiarity between you two is only professional?”
“Of course, sir! I-I don’t have any intention to deceive you or the director. Believe me, it’s the last thing I would do.”
Ohno eyed him momentarily with a hard look weighing on his features before he turned back to finish the director’s coffee. After he brusquely poured milk into the cup and an unmeasured, yet concerning, amount of sugar, he was ready to leave, but not before giving Aiba a last look. A distrustful air made Ohno sigh at Aiba, inspecting him from head to toe.
“Get back to work.” Ohno commanded, and after Aiba assured him he would, Ohno parted to the director’s office.
It had been quite a while since he had seen this side of Ohno. The more stress drove him, the more he appeared to reflect the director himself. But the last thing any of the employees at the office needed was a second director to be looking at their flaws and reporting on them every so often. Yet unlike Sakurai, Ohno had the capacity to seem normal much frequently.
~
‘Secretary’s in a bad mood again.
Things must be tough in there.’
‘…’
~
‘It’s been long since we last spoke,
I’m starting to get worried. Is everything okay?
‘You know you can tell me anything, Nino.’
‘I feel like going for ramen but it’s not as delicious
without a friend.’
‘Anything I can do?’
‘…’
‘Just text me if you change your mind.’
~
‘Sorry I saw your message so late.
Had to turn off my phone.’
‘Don’t worry about it. It wasn’t the
right time anyway.’
‘Was your day any better than mine?’
‘You mean tiring, stressful and endless?’
‘Yes, but you forgot unbearable.’
‘I suppose you’ve already heard of the
Murakami Corp. scandal.’
‘Sadly, it’s all I’ve been hearing about today.’
‘This is a mess. What are we going to do?’
‘Bear with it. They weren’t our only clients so
I’m sure they’ll think of alternatives to get through it.’
‘I’m only thinking of the worst. I can’t possibly
imagine what administration is like right now.’
‘They shouldn’t be taking it lightly, but they
can’t despair either.’
‘What are your predictions on this?’
‘I don’t know…’
‘I’m not in the right position
to infer about it.’
‘Maybe not as an employee, but what would
you say as my friend?’
‘Don’t think about it too much.’
‘I’m sure they’re being as cautious as they can.’
‘And if it comes down to lay-offs?’
‘It’s still very uncertain. It doesn’t necessarily
have to come to that.’
‘I hope so, or we would be in trouble.’
‘I wouldn’t be surprised, though,
if they were drawing names already.’
‘The director should have a few as well.
Even though it would be a big hit on the company,
It’s the easiest alternative. Anything else would
make them waste resources.’
‘Right now, new contracts would mean gold.’
‘Now that you mention it…’
‘?’
‘I’m meeting with a client tomorrow.’
‘For?’
‘It’s a new client. They seem very interested
to open an offer with us. So far, they were pleased
with the preliminary pitch and they asked
me to assess the project. They might be signing a
contract very soon, but nothing is for certain.’
‘Aiba, that’s really great news.’
‘I know. I really hope I don’t blow it this once.’
‘What are you saying? You’ll do great.’
‘At least, it’ll be some good news to report back at the office.’
‘Don’t mention the contract unless they do so first.
At any case, lean into it as subtly as possible, and
only if they seem approving.’
‘Right.’
‘It’s good to show them you’re prepared,
but any miscalculation will seem like you’re
forcing it and that’s clearly not what you want.’
‘I haven’t thought about this enough.
This could go wrong in some many ways.
I may get called out for not advancing on them before.’
‘The last thing I want is to end on bad terms
with the director.’
‘Relax. You’ve done it before.’
‘The company really needs this. I don’t want to
disappoint him now.’
‘Why would you?’
‘Well… I’ve already got my strikes and you know
he’s very delicate with these things. Messing up now
would put me in a bad position.’
‘Are you afraid of him?’
‘To a certain extent… I guess I was.’
‘But, I don’t know... It’s been different lately.’
‘What is?’
‘He’s different… somehow.’
‘?’
‘It’s complicated to say anything in specific.
It’s not like he’s changed, but I think I realized he is
more conscious of himself than what I thought.
He’s hard to read, regardless, but maybe
he is trying to understand himself as well.’
‘You think there’s another side to him?’
‘There has to be.’
‘He is not very sincere with himself.’
‘If he were, he’d be a totally different person.’
‘He’s more of a coward to me.’
‘Someone who is just trying to hide himself
with authority.’
‘Maybe that same privilege is what’s stopping him
from being anything else?’
‘I don’t know if I would blame him for that.’
‘Sounds like you know him.’
‘I don’t really.’
‘Nino and I use to think of ways to justify his behavior.
It was our way of helping me get over my stress
whenever I received a complaint from the director.
It would give me reasons not to hate my job.’
‘That… sounds quite inventive.’
‘Because of it, I started to think of the
director differently.’
‘I still get nervous around him though.
I don’t think I’ll ever get used to it.’
‘How would you say he feels around his employees?’
‘Perhaps, judged. I’m starting to get a feeling
he’s misunderstood as well.’
‘Because of what you mentioned earlier?’
‘Exactly.’
‘Do you think he wants to be understood?’
‘I’m not sure. He could be scared. In that case,
you would be right. He might be a coward.’
‘Do you hate him?’
‘It’s hard to like someone like that,
but I wouldn’t call it hate. Before all,
being understanding is more important.’
‘That sounds deep.’
‘Yeah. I must be getting sleepy.’
‘You’re the type who gets lost in thought the later it gets?’
‘And I begin to bore myself as well, yeah.’
‘But it’s interesting, what you said. You seem to have a talent for reading people.’
‘You think so? There are still people I can’t quite grasp yet,
though I really wish I could.’
‘Maybe with time, they’ll come around.’
‘With time.’
‘I’ll let you rest.’
‘Alright. You should rest too, Anon.’
‘I will. Good night.’
‘Night.’
~
Aiba expected no less from Nino when the latter never returned his messages. After all, Aiba agreed it was better to do things personally than through text, but the younger didn’t know the amount of work that was pilling on that prevented Aiba from visiting the café. This day was no different from the last.
Since he boarded the train to work that morning, Aiba had been going back and forth through the papers he would be handing to his client that same afternoon, making revisions and ensuring that everything was in order. He was so concerned it’d only made it harder for him to fall asleep that previous night after his talk with Anon. It was nothing a cup of coffee couldn’t fix, thought Aiba, thinking that if he made it on time to the office today, he might be visiting Nino after all. It was not in his calculations though, that he would be arriving at the same time as the director and just a second too late to take the elevator before him.
Aiba resented to walk any further, even when the elevator remained empty behind Sakurai. A whole day stuck in those same four walls was enough for him to learn that lesson. In fact, Aiba was happy to wait for the next elevator, yet it didn’t seem to be the case for Sakurai, when the latter’s hand had stopped the elevator before it closed on Aiba.
“You don’t expect me to make you late on purpose, do you?”
Aiba paused, confused by Sakurai’s sudden gesture. He was ready to refuse if it wasn’t for the same person who held the door for him. He found it surprising that Sakurai would be by himself once again, especially now that he knew of the suspicions that arose each passing day. Still, he didn’t appear concerned to be seen alone that morning. On the contrary, Aiba would say he appeared rather willing to risk any odds if it only meant he could prove something.
The longer Aiba hesitated, the more it seemed for Sakurai’s words to become an order, rather than a courtesy. Eventually, Aiba obliged, stepping in and standing by the end of the compartment, making his presence less noticeable.
“I thought it was required that you used your own elevator, sir.” Aiba inferred in a low voice, afraid his comment would not be welcomed by the other’s customary silence. He gained a brief look from the other, nonetheless.
“Have I ever said that?” Sakurai asked doubtfully.
“It is what everyone thinks.”
“Nonsense.” Sakurai straightened his suit as their stop approached. “I can use the elevator as I please.”
The elevator rang harmoniously, and its doors opened to their floor. Sakurai proceeded while Aiba stayed behind, waiting for the trail of “good mornings” that followed the director down the hall to subside. Aiba appreciated Sakurai’s words, but it would certainly raise looks if Aiba would allow himself to be seen coming out behind him. No matter what the director may think, it was on Aiba they would give expression to their (possible) jealousy.
~
“Hey Aiba, can I have a minute?” Ikuta Toma called him to his desk just a row away from his own.
Regardless of being a long-recruited employee as Aiba himself and Mitsushima, Ikuta barely spoke to him unless he really needed to. The way Aiba remembered it, Ikuta had been much closer with Kazama than himself since the three of them use to share lunch when they first started working together. After a few years, Ikuta never found a reason to spend any more time with them, and even less with Aiba, after Kazama was gone. Meaning this “minute” he asked from Aiba would surely cost him a favor.
“I don’t know if it’s of any trouble, but I was asked to scan these and send them over to the production department,” as expected, he showed him a file with several labeled papers. “But I was asked to attend a meeting with a client at some restaurant, and if I don’t get out now, I might not make it in time.” He glanced at his wrist watch, as if their conversation was any more time consuming. “Think you can give me a hand?”
Aiba had also taken a glance at the time, knowing very well his own meeting could happen at any minute, but judging by Ikuta’s impatience, he still had some time to spare.
On Aiba’s approval to help, Ikuta thanked him endlessly before he’d even finished picking up his things to leave, but eventually, after promising him to return the favor for the tenth time, he took his leave. Aiba wondered if this was what Jun meant by “helping him when they decided to dump all the work on him”. Sadly, Ikuta must have been clever enough to tell Aiba would understand his worry and even worse, Matsumoto had not reported back to work that day either.
Regardless, there weren’t many papers to go through. Thankfully the printing room was empty which gave Aiba time to double check if all the papers were scanned without a flaw. After paging through them and beginning to prepare the email, Aiba carefully measured there was still time before his client’s arrival. The time it took for each file to load was crucial and consuming. It didn’t take long before the preparing of the email became a race with time. He revised the files one last time and once the mail was sent, he rushed towards the elevator, picking up his brief case and files with a few minutes to spare.
~
‘Wondering about you.’
‘About your meeting, I mean.’
‘Text me when you can.’
‘Anon?’
‘Sorry, I just saw your message.’
‘Don’t mind it.’
‘Is everything okay?’
‘I… think so.’
‘You don’t sound too sure.’
‘You can tell?’
‘Should I be worried?’
‘No.’
‘I was just… not expecting this at all.’
‘They liked it. They were actually… impressed.’
‘The meeting must have lasted at least 40 minutes,
and the whole time, they were praising our work.
They’ve agree for negotiations to continue and they’ll be
returning tomorrow to sign the contract.’
‘Aiba… that’s amazing!’
‘I’m having a hard time taking it in.’
‘I’ve been sitting in the lobby since they left.
I can’t believe what a rollercoaster of a week
this has been.’
‘I can imagine.’
‘It has worked out for the best.’
‘I’m happy for you. Truly.’
‘I guess I should be thanking you,
for being there all this time.’
‘What are you saying? This was all your hard work.’
‘That I got through thanks to your support.’
‘Really. Thank you.’
‘I can’t believe it’s almost done!’
‘I guess you would want to celebrate this after.’
‘A cold beer would really hit the spot.
I’ve been craving it lately.’
‘How about… a glass of wine and a meal?’
‘That could work too, although
I don’t have any at home.’
‘What if it doesn’t have to be at home?’
‘Why? Where else would it be?’
‘I mean… What if you don’t have to go home?’
‘For the wine and the food.’
‘??’
‘Maybe, we could go somewhere else?’
‘We?’
‘If you want to, of course.’
‘Anon…’
‘Are you… asking me out?’
‘…’
‘You’re saying you want to go somewhere?
With me? You? Anon?’
‘If you want to.’
‘And, do you want me to?’
‘I am asking you.’
‘As in a date?’
‘You could call it that.’
‘And… you’ll be there?’
‘I suppose.’
Aiba had to look up from his phone to realize his heart was pounding uncontrollably. Yet the serenity of the lobby forced him to seal in any trace of what the text he read was causing him to feel. His hand held on his chest as it started to hurt the more he read. His throat became dry right after, unable to utter a single word and even worst on forming them into text. His pause seemed to take so long, and Anon was typing again.
‘If it’s any trouble, you can forget I said anything.’
‘Wait.’
‘You’ll be there?’
‘For real?’
‘…’
‘Maybe.’
‘How certain is maybe?’
‘Maybe I’ll be there.’
‘What if not?’
’I will still keep you company.’
‘And if I want you to be there no matter what?’
‘I will.’
‘You promise?’
‘I do.’
~
‘I know you must be busy, but I really need to talk to you.’
‘Can you wait for me when you’re done?’
‘Please, Nino? Before I do something stupid!’
‘Where are you?’
‘You already left, didn’t you?’
‘Still mad?’
‘…’
‘I wish you could tell me what’s going on.’
‘I’m really worried.’
‘If you need to talk, you know what to do.’
~
Aiba had thought it was the night before his meeting when he’d found it most difficult to fall asleep, but that evening after tidying himself for bed, he’d saw the hours passing as he stared at his ceiling, his heart racing again, almost accidentally. His phone stared back at him from his bedside table as the thief of his sleep. Occasionally, he would grab it again to scan through their conversation again, finding it more difficult each time to close his eyes. Eventually, it was the reassuring thought of Anon’s promise that gave him peace of mind, putting all his trust in the man he talked to on his phone.
Coffee was much needed the next morning, but he decided to make some himself after receiving no response from Ninomiya yet. He understood now he had to take Anon’s words to heart and perhaps give him the space he needed, since he trusted he would come around when he was ready. Although this had him confused early in the morning, his surprise was different when a familiar voice greeted him “Good morning” in the break room.
“Jun!” Aiba exclaimed, finding the younger watching him by the door. “You’re back! You didn’t even tell me you were coming.”
“Guess I wanted to surprise you.” Jun’s smirk indicated he was more than pleased with his reaction.
“Then, I suppose everything is fine?” Aiba guessed.
“More or less,” Jun sighed moving into the room. “I was meaning to wait a little longer until things were for certain, but… my mother worried I was losing too many days of work. She made me come so I wouldn’t be in trouble or else, she said I would be in trouble with her.”
“I think you made the right choice.” Masaki laughed.
“I wasn’t really ready to leave her, but she knows about this whole deal with Sakurai and how it would only get worse. I think she noticed I was getting worried about work as well, after you told me what happened with the law firm.”
“It’s been a tough couple of days,” Aiba asserted. “Tensions in administration are building up, but nothing is for sure. I’d say, she was right about making you come, and from what I hear, I think she’s as concerned for you as you for her.” A small chuckle escaped Jun’s lips, a trace of color lighting his cheeks. “She’ll be fine. I can promise you that.”
There was no response from Jun other than his smile and the capturing of Masaki’s gaze in his, deep and warming as Jun’s eyes always felt. It was only when he moved away that the lure in his eyes broke and Masaki remembered his coffee was sitting, forgotten, on the counter.
“What about you?” Jun asked, fixing his curiosity on Aiba.
“What about me?”
“What are you up to?”
“The usual, I guess?” Masaki’s head tilted while he poured sugar in his cup.
“And you’re so well dressed today because…?” Jun eyed him with a smirk in his voice.
If it wasn’t for Jun’s suggestive tone, Masaki would have already forgotten his plans for that evening or even the fact that he’d decided to wear something different for work today. But adding a vest under his good suit was nothing to be surprised about, or was it? It just happened to be the first clothing item he laid eyes on that morning. It didn’t necessarily have to mean he was expecting something to happen that night.
“It’s nothing in particular,” Aiba lied through his teeth. “Why? Do I look weird?’
“I don’t know… Just a little different. Is it that meeting you have today?”
Masaki’s cup rested on his lips, hiding a shy smirk. “A meeting of some sort.”
But Jun’s suspicions didn’t die down throughout the day, even after Aiba had made the excuse of his contract signing that same evening. All day long, his attention kept fixing on Aiba as if inspecting, wondering if there was anything he may have missed over the days of his absence. But Aiba was unbreakable, and eventually, he decided to rely on Aiba’s words to convince him it was nothing he should worry about.
That afternoon, shortly after his meeting with their client had finished with the signing of the contract and a round of handshakes, Aiba received the much-awaited text. He waited before coming into the office to read his new message and observed as the sender typed into their chat.
‘Bambino Restaurant. By the Tokyo Bay. 8:00pm.
Reservations for Aiba Masaki.’
‘Don’t be late.’
Masaki chuckled to himself with his last message when he should have felt offended.
‘I wouldn’t miss it.’
~
‘Nino?’
‘This must be getting irritating for you but listen.’
‘I don’t trust anyone more than you, but I can’t ask for your
help if you’re still acting like this.’
‘I’ll go straight to the point.’
‘I’m sorry for being as carefree as you think I am.
I am sorry for bothering you all those times we went for
ramen and I wouldn’t shut up about him.
I realize now it must have bothered you that
I didn’t talk about anything else. I admit it, you were right.
I am a complete idiot.’
‘I haven’t been acting like myself lately and I failed to realize
that even after you did. I treated you like a stranger when
you were trying to be my friend. And I was a bigger idiot for not
listening to you and I’m probably the biggest idiot there is even now,
so I will say it again… I’m sorry.’
‘I can’t say more right now because I have to go, and your phone
is probably ringing like crazy and I know how much you
hate that, but I’m afraid I need to ask something from you.’
‘If I don’t text you by midnight, call me. Okay?
Please, don’t be alarmed. Would you do this for me?’
‘Good night.’
~
Masaki stepped out of the cab to the location he’d specified the driver as Bambino by the Tokyo Bay. The establishment had a small entrance and a window modestly displaying its name. A small crowd was queuing by the door to be seated, as it appeared the place was small and crowded, mostly by couples as Masaki observed. But following the instructions he was given, he went inside when his clock marked the stated time and stood by the front desk.
When asked for reservation, Masaki gave his name timidly, afraid the very intimidating middle-aged receptionist would kick him out immediately after not finding him in the list. Yet instead, it was much to his surprise when the receptionist called for a waiter to show him to his table.
As soon as he was welcomed to leave his coat on the coat rack, he began to feel the nerves sinking in his stomach. Masaki was hesitant to follow the waiter deeper into the restaurant. He became too aware of himself with just the amount of people inside the place. But their eyes became nothing when Masaki realized the full extent of the restaurant he walked through. It was almost a narrow salon, extending vertically into two floors with round tables, lit by candles and other dimmer lights that gave way for the splendor of a chandelier to light up the rest of the room. Masaki had almost forgotten to follow his waiter, tranced by all its elegance and he would have stopped to admire it even more if he hadn’t remembered his table awaited.
The realization suddenly hit him when he wondered what he would do if he found the table occupied. Anon had promised him, after all, that he would be there, but to what extend did he agree to reveal himself to Aiba, he didn’t know. A knot tied in his stomach, almost forbidding him to move.
After crossing through the entire establishment, they finally arrived at his table. Located in the extreme end of the restaurant with the most breath-taking window view facing towards the Tokyo Bay, it was a small round table for two that, at the moment, remained empty.
The waiter offered him a seat which Aiba accepted with a still too hesitant tone of voice, his words being taken away by the beauty of the scenery. After placing a single menu on the table, the waiter asked him for a drink to start the evening, but Aiba could only request for water, not knowing if there were further plans he still didn’t know of.
The waiter moved out with his order and Masaki could finally lay back on his chair to take it all in. The place, the people, the view, everything was far too overwhelming he could barely think straight. It wasn’t until his eyes laid on the empty chair across the table that he decided to take out his phone, leaving the menu untouched. To his surprise, someone was already typing at the other side.
‘You’re here.’
‘I’m having a lot of trouble deciphering
what exactly is here.’
‘Are we even in Japan anymore?’
‘Do you like it?’
‘I love it! It is amazing! And the bay is so…!’
‘Beautiful?’
‘You took the words out of my mouth.’
‘It’s what came to mind when I saw you come in.’
‘You look amazing tonight.’
‘I can’t believe you actually came.’
‘Does that mean you’re here too?’
‘I promised you, didn’t I?’
‘Meaning… if I look around, I may catch
a glimpse of you looking my way?’
‘If you get lucky.’
‘Why? Do you work here? Is Anon actually living
a double life? Salary man by day, waiter by night?’
‘Wouldn’t that just be the most interesting
character you’ve heard of?’
‘It would be interesting to see the secret to your success.’
‘I’m afraid I can’t reveal such things right now,
but if you allow me, I would like to make use of
my talent to serve you.’
‘I would like to make your evening, Aiba Masaki.’
‘I’m listening.’
‘There will be three services. I will be recommending
my favorite plates, if you don’t mind. I thought maybe
sharing my palate would satisfy your curiosity to learn
more about me.’
‘That is indeed a desire I would very much like to satisfy.’
‘In addition, I will be choosing for wine. I know you
wanted something strong but, I’m afraid we would
need something rather appropriate to the circumstances
in which we are meeting (just so you know, I don’t want to
get you drunk). I will allow you to make all themes of
conversation you wish for this one night, meaning you
can ask whatever you want. Lastly, the receipt is mine,
so you are free to go at any point of the night. I will not
be holding you here if you don’t want to or if you feel
uncomfortable. I wish only for you to enjoy your time.
You deserve it after all.’
‘Questions?’
‘This is a lot to take in.’
‘Am I over doing it?’
‘You can tell me if it gets weird. I’ll stop.’
‘No! This is all too sweet of you! I don’t think I deserve so much from you.’
‘It’s the least I could do.’
‘That’s hard to believe.’
‘It’s the truth.’
‘All of this?’
‘And all you leave me to do is say thank you?’
‘You being here is enough.’
‘I wish I could do more.’
‘In time.’
‘But now, it’s time for your wine.’
His waiter approached not a moment later carrying a bottle of the tinted liquid and excused himself before pouring it into Masaki’s cup. A description of the drink was offered in Masaki’s phone while the author of his messages explained the reasons of his selection for their evening.
‘I imagined it will suit your taste.’
‘It does!’
‘It’s very familiar, somehow.’
‘Really?’
‘Maybe my parents use to have it back at the restaurant.
The strong smell really sends me back. It seems nostalgic.’
‘Did I pass?’
‘Perfectly!’
‘Phew…’
‘This is unfair.’
‘This must be costing you so much.
I don’t want to feel greedy.’
‘You’re not, Aiba. Really.’
‘Let me do something for you.
To, at least, compensate you for all of this.’
‘You don’t have to.’
‘Call me Masaki.’
‘…’
‘Use my first name from now on.’
‘I know it might not be much,
but we can start from somewhere.’
‘What do you think?’
‘I don’t want you to think that you owe
me anything.’
‘But I want to. If it would at least make
you happy.’
‘Can I ask?’
‘What would it mean if I used your first name?’
‘I suppose… it’ll make us much closer.’
‘Why?’
‘Will it make you shy?’
‘You have an odd image of me being shy over
everything.’
‘Says the guy who wouldn’t meet with
his date face to face.’
‘That’s a different thing. I have my reasons.’
‘I would like to hear them.’
‘Before we get to that, it’s time to take your order.’
Masaki was asked by Anon to direct his attention to the menu, showing him through the vast selection of plates for the first course. Their complexity in names and ingredients had left Masaki intimidated, but he had no doubt each one was as delicious as the last.
‘The chef’s selection for today is also a good choice,
but there are others I would prefer before that.’
‘Then… I’ll let you choose.
You have recommendations,
so let’s go with those.’
‘All of them?’
‘Sure. You know them better than I do.
I trust your taste. I’m sure you can make
it an interesting experience.’
‘Alright, as you please.’
The waiter returned, and Masaki dictated every plate that was texted to him by Anon. Although a keen curiosity may have crossed the other as Aiba read the plate’s names through his phone, he always displayed a smile and moved away with his order right after.
‘Now… can I proceed with my questions?’
‘Of course.’
‘Tell me the reason you’re not sitting
right across me.’
‘I may or may not be busy right now.’
‘So, you are a waiter after all.’
‘I may be, for tonight.’
‘Are you my waiter?’
‘I doubt it though, he doesn’t look like you.’
‘What does that even mean?’
‘I mean… he doesn’t look like the you in my head.’
‘And how exactly do I look in your head?’
‘Well it’s nothing specific. I don’t have your eyes or
hair color or your face in detail.’
‘But your words, or rather the way I read your text
kind of gives away a fraction of what your
voice would sound like.’
‘Then, how would you describe it?’
‘Deep, passionate, a little timid sometimes.’
‘Haha.’
‘But overall… Gentle.’
‘It’s a voice that is hard to get tired of.’
‘That’s very nice of you to say.’
‘I hope I get to hear the real deal some time.’
‘It’s nothing extraordinary though. Average.’
‘Will you give me the chance to see for myself?’
‘Hmm…’
‘Have I heard it before? Is that why you don’t want to?’
‘Because I’ll know?’
‘…’
‘What?’
‘I can’t be getting too carried away, aren’t I?
You said I could ask anything.’
‘I’m sorry.’
‘Alright…’
‘Why do you insist on these secrets so much?’
‘To be honest…’
‘I thought it might make it interesting when
I first started texting you. But I realized it’s only
been hurting you so far.’
‘Not necessarily.’
‘Some days I’m more confused than others.’
‘At least right now, on our date, I’m okay.’
‘You don’t hate it?’
‘No, not in particular.’
‘It takes away that awkwardness I usually
feel when I go out with someone.’
‘I’m not saying this has to be any less of a date
than the rest, but it’s different and it feels good.’
‘Still, if I’m very honest, I feel kind of nervous.’
‘Why is that?’
‘I don’t know what I’ll do if I see you tonight.’
‘Neither do I.’
‘But it doesn’t mean I don’t want to.’
‘Do you… still don’t want me to?’
‘It’s complicated.’
‘So complicated I wouldn’t understand?’
‘That’s where I feel nervous.’
‘Wait.’
‘My first plate is here!’
‘That was fast.’
‘Yeah, I like the service here too.’
‘It’s soup.’
‘That’s right.’
‘It’s smells incredible. My mouth is
watering already.’
‘Stop texting and eat!’
‘Alright, I’ll partake!’
‘Do you like it?’
‘Shh! I’m eating.’
‘…’
‘…’
‘You can still text me occasionally you know.’
‘You told me to eat, so I’m eating.’
‘This is too good, even my eyes are watering.’
‘I’m glad to hear that.’
‘I just thought of another question.’
‘Yes?’
‘Give me a letter from your name.’
‘?’
‘Supposing your name was in romaji,
will you give me a letter?’
‘Hm…’
‘It doesn’t have to be the first letter.
Any other letter is fine.’
‘I’m not holding back!’
‘I guess… it is only fair.’
‘Your answer?’
‘O.’
‘O?’
‘Mhm.’
‘There is also and “O” in Anon.
You’re not trying to trick me, are you?’
‘No, I don’t intend to trick you.’
‘I’ll take it.’
‘An “O” huh?’
‘Yeah.’
‘Family name or given name?’
‘…’
‘Also, more than one?’
‘No comment.’
‘Hmp…’
‘Are you done with your soup?’
‘Almost.’
‘It’s better to eat while warm. Don’t let it get too cold.’
‘Your second plate should be arriving soon.’
‘Can’t wait!’
‘You can take your time though, we have all night.’
‘And I suppose you’ll use my name
at some point of the evening, no?’
‘Right…’
‘May I ask, why the sudden urge for me to type your name?’
‘I don’t know… maybe I want to
imagine your voice saying it.’
‘Because?’
‘Because I imagine it’ll make you blush.’
‘And it’ll be easier to spot you from my table.’
‘Quite humorous tonight, aren’t you?’
‘I’m in a good mood, yes. The food is really
hitting the spot.’
‘Are you eating too, Anon?’
‘I ate.’
‘I’m just having a glass for now.’
‘Second plate is here!’
‘As I imagined, pasta.’
‘It goes well after the soup. Give it a try.’
‘Can we make a toast first?’
‘A toast?’
‘I realized we haven’t so it’ll be nice.’
‘And what would you toast for?’
‘For closing the contract and… For having
someone like you.’
‘What will you toast for?’
‘For meeting you, Masaki.’
Aiba was glad for once Anon wasn’t sitting right across from him, or he would catch the deep shade of color on his face, and how he was unable to hold back the smile on his lips, as he drank to Anon’s toast.
As the night’s conversation increased, time made them both engaged in one another. Masaki hadn’t acknowledged the lights in the room got dimmer the later it became, for the light of his phone screen was all he saw. He’d barely noticed his third plate arriving at his table and almost forgot to complement Anon on his selection for dessert, which was as exquisite as everything else he’d experienced that night.
Even after his last plate remained empty and his waiter had filled his cup for a third time, Aiba had no plans of leaving his table yet. Not while he was in the middle of his conversation and the night felt too young to finish so soon. He refused to believe how late it’d gotten. He wished only for Anon to not notice so he wouldn’t leave. Masaki dreaded the thought of seeing him go, so he carried on further with their conversation if it only meant the night would last a little longer.
‘How long has it been since
you first texted me?’
‘A few months.’
‘A lot has happened since then,
but I feel like I’ve known you for longer.’
‘I know what you mean.’
‘Have you been there all this time?’
‘Depends if you’ve noticed me.’
‘I want to. More than anything right now.’
‘Have I talked to you before in person?’
‘You talk to many at the office.’
‘Has it ever been you?’
‘It’s safe to say it has.’
‘How was it? That first time we talked.’
‘That’s a good question.’
‘Do you remember it?’
‘I do.’
‘What exactly do you remember?’
‘You.’
‘What about me?’
‘I just remember you. You were all I saw.’
‘What did I do to make you remember me?’
‘You made me smile, when I hadn’t
smiled for a really long time.’
‘Did you realized then that you liked me?’
‘I’m not sure. I can’t pinpoint the exact
same moment. It was rather an odd combination
of things that made me realize you stood out above all.
Maybe I’d liked you since before, but I never admitted
it to myself. Maybe I tried to convince myself at some
point I didn’t really like you, but you made it impossible for me.
Maybe it was all at once.’
‘You hide away so much, you don’t want me to
know who you are, does that mean you regret
having gotten this far into knowing me?’
‘No.’
‘I don’t think I would be as happy as I am
now if I would have chosen to forget you.’
‘But I still wonder what it means that you
haven’t forgotten me either.’
‘Would you believe me if I told you
I wonder about that myself?’
‘I wish I could get an answer out of you.’
‘I promised you, didn’t I?’
‘It’s only fair that I should, but even now,
I don’t know what to say.’
‘Rather than what you think, I would like to know
how you feel. About me. About all of this.’
‘Why is it that you rather sit there than go home?’
‘…’
‘I am… confused.’
‘You make me confused.’
‘May I ask why?’
‘It’s not that there is something tearing me apart,
but it is you I’m confused about.’
‘Because I feel I know you, I feel you are real,
but no matter what I do, I can’t prove it. And because you’re so far
away from my understanding I can’t prove what I feel either.
And maybe… I’m just going crazy over everything.’
‘You’re not crazy.’
‘But I am.’
‘And being here all this time only makes it
more obvious. Talking to you like this, when it should
be different. It should be you, sitting across from me
and not just my phone. We could talk and eat and laugh
together if only you would be willing to.’
‘We could be meeting face to face and looking into each other
and realizing that we both want the same things, that we
both feel the same way. But it can’t be like that, because
this is anything but ordinary. But the worst part is that
I’m not doing anything to stop it. Because, maybe…
I don’t want it to stop. And maybe I want this
more than I should.’
‘Even when I call you Anon, you still are who I want.
And because I don’t know if it’s in any way real,
I’m reduced to think it’s the idea of you that I’m in love with.’
‘Masaki…’
‘Still think I’m not crazy?’
‘This is my fault.’
‘I shouldn’t be the coward I am, but I don’t know
what to do when it comes to you and it has lead
me to do this.’
‘I did wrong. And I continue to do wrong, because
I haven’t changed my mind either. I believe it’s better
that we stay this way, in this distance. And if I’ve really
hurt you that way, maybe it’s time that we both forget it as well.’
‘Is that what you really think?’
‘Is that truly how you feel?’
‘I don’t. But it’s for the best.’
‘Then you’re cowering away again?’
‘…’
‘I wonder what it is that you want
to protect so much.’
‘To be so strong as to control your feelings,
it must really be important.’
‘Far more than what you can imagine.’
‘Then I won’t doubt you.’
‘But I can’t agree with you.’
‘Because I at least want to prove how real you are.’
‘How?’
‘I want to feel you close to me.’
‘Not all the way across the room or at the
other end of the office, but next to me.’
‘Then… if it’s for you, I want to try.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘Wait’
Seeing the other had stopped typing, Masaki’s attention left his phone to contemplate the room. His eyes searched through it vaguely, half wanting to find someone that he could recognize and half not wanting to see anything at all. His feelings wavered, impatient to know why the other had to make him wait any longer. Finally, he’d returned to the chat, but his typing took longer than expected.
‘There is a back door just down the hall behind you.
An emergency exit should be there. If you go through,
you’ll be right outside to the balcony. It is the sight you
can see through your window.’
‘Go to the veranda and wait there, facing the view.’
‘Anon?’
‘Once you do so, would you close your eyes as well?’
‘You’re serious?’
‘Will you?’
‘Wait.’
‘What if you’re someone who is out of my league?’
‘Don’t worry.’
‘You already are beyond mine.’
~
The view of the Tokyo Bay was much clearer from the outside, separated by the veranda and the skyline of the illuminated city. A wind was blowing heavily on Masaki reminding him of the absence of his coat, but knowing he couldn’t go back to find it, he’d compromised with waiting just a little longer. If it hadn’t been for the strong pounding in his chest, the night would have been soundless. He rubbed his hands to look for heat, but they still shook with the anticipation of hearing the emergency door creak open.
He tried taking in the fresh air, fixing on just a single spot of the view, and waiting for the butterflies in his stomach to settle. If only he would have given Masaki more time, perhaps it would have worked to make him feel calm, but the small creak was enough to make him jolt and become paralyzed.
It became so silent, Masaki could hear the other’s steps coming closer behind him, but slowly and timidly, as if there were a possibility that Masaki would escape. Masaki didn’t move, and he suddenly remembered the condition he’d agreed to. It was almost painful to abandon the view in front of him to find himself in the wavering dark, but if it was of any help for the other to overcome his insecurity, Masaki could agree his sense of sight was of little importance.
Masaki felt nothing, as if the approaching footsteps had been a product of his imagination. Everything became silence once more. Masaki felt a loss of breath as he’d been bracing himself all this time, and made himself dizzy, waiting for the first signs of presence from the other, making every second unbearable the more they hesitated.
Suddenly, a weight was dropped over Masaki’s shoulders, making him gasp suddenly, shortly to realize he was being sheltered from the cold. It only took him a moment to feel the fabric and realize it was his own coat hanging familiarly on his shoulders. The contact with the fabric had driven most of his trembling away and what remained was caused by the person who stood barely centimeters away from him.
At first, it was just the touch of his fingers meeting Masaki’s with a small brush, hesitantly wondering if it was okay to stay. After a much bold attempt, Masaki made enough contact to allow him to go further, reaching towards the other’s warm touch, until he held Masaki’s hand gently in his.
Meanwhile, Masaki took all the mental notes he could about the smoothness of his palm, the firmness in his finger and the electricity to his touch. He tried drawing the images that had started forming in his head, but regardless, it wasn’t enough. He needed to know more.
Masaki’s hand abandoned the touch of his finger and began to trace up his arm, feeling the texture of his clothes. He continued wondering just how far he could go on, yet the other’s hand never came to stop him and before he knew it, Masaki’s hand rested over his chest. Something drummed under the mass of his clothes, and it increased the further he allowed Masaki’s touch to wander.
The tip of his finger found his neck hesitantly, knowing that the one thing he much desired to open his eyes to was there. He reached for his face and found comfort in his warm cheeks. He traced his jawline, looking for its form, trying to find a name. But it was no use being deprived from the only sense that could tell him once and for all. Nonetheless, he was decided to try again if it wasn’t for the lips that his fingers found in their way, that made Masaki pull back at once.
The other didn’t seem to make a sound, and while Masaki wondered if he should utter a word of apology, he felt the other’s warmth shortening their distance, enough for Masaki to hear him breathe shakenly.
Masaki felt his hand, this time entwinning their fingers making it impossible to let go. For a long second that expanded with each breath, he thought he would hear something from the other, but not a word came. It was only but his hand reaching behind Masaki’s neck, the new contact making him gasp and part his lips. The invitation was all but ignored when he felt the other’s body leaning closer and slightly brushing the entrance to Masaki’s lips before claiming them at once.
His kiss, smooth and careful, caused Masaki to respond. The latter’s hand moving to tug lightly on the other’s coat as his heart accelerated. A sweet sensation seemed to spark and drape Masaki’s body, wishing only for his lips to say more, hoping to find the answer he looked for there.
Regretfully, his lips pulled away gradually, almost apologizing for the promptness of their arrival when the only remorse that persisted was when Masaki wondered why they didn’t stay any longer.
It seemed as though he heard Aiba’s thoughts when he felt his firm grip still pulling on his clothes, unwilling to let him go, wondering if he reached far enough he would still find him again. Instead, they stumbled clumsily, with the side of his nose due to Masaki’s miscalculation. Although he drew back embarrassed, Masaki’s attempt was all but ignored when the other’s hand cupped his cheek and guided him back into their kiss.
The gentleness of the other’s touch deepened and Aiba’s heart was sent ablaze with each alluring brush. He wished it would have lasted longer, but he recognized the increasing temptation that, eventually, wouldn’t allow them to break apart, and it took the other all his strengths to find himself again, and brashly pull away. Their lips parted with a sound, as they realized they were short of breath.
Masaki felt the strong urge to open his eyes again, a battle he could barely fight against instinct. But feeling the other’s hand grabbing on his to pull his grip away, he remembered to resist. The moment his touch fluttered away, he heard his urgent steps turning and fading, feeding the distance between them until there was nothing to hear. Still in the attempt to prove his fleeting, Masaki’s hand reached out in front of him and was only welcomed by his absence.
He didn’t dare open them, unafraid of the dark but terrified to find nothing but the vacant night. He turned around, his hands finding the veranda as his body trembled once more. When his eyes opened, he was comforted by the lights of the skyline that were still present. He realized there was only him in the silence. Still his fingers traced his lips again, willing to find a piece of him there.
A/N: End of Chapter 7. Bet you didn't know this was a date chapter. Anon has appeared in front of Aiba so he is real after all, right? Does Aiba finally have a clue now after that kiss or is he only more confused? We'll see what happens in our next chapter. Thanks for reading~!
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Things are getting super interesting!! Anon actually met up with Aiba, yayyyy ♡ and the kiss! ♡♡♡ (i'm too happy to see Aiba being pampered :p) also, he has such good willpower not to open his eyes ne... I would probably have unintentionally opened by mistake if it had been me. XP
I actually have my suspicions that Anon is probably Sho...(?) hehe ^^;but I'll patiently wait for the next chapter! I may be wrong lol.
Also, Aiba might be able to tell by height alone... did he have to bend or stretch to kiss? That is the question. XD
Thank you so much for sharing~!!♡
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Glad you enjoyed that little surprise~ Indeed, it must be hard to resist the impulse of not opening one's eyes. I would also probably make the same mistake lol.
Aiba is pretty tall...
Thanks for reading and commenting~!
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Thanks for reading and commenting~!
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This is so sweet, the date is so sweet, the blinded meeting was so intense, but at the same time, like Aiba, Anon is giving me very confused feelings. "I’m reduced to think it’s the idea of you that I’m in love with." -- saaaame.
I do wish that the reveal will come sooner. While reading this chapter, I suddenly had second thoughts about my guess on who Anon is (but since I live for all Aiba pairings, there's no problem with that) but it's the idea of this particular pairing guess that makes me in love with this story (in vein with Aiba's idea of Anon";)
Thanks for this chapter. :D
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I'm happy you feel so strongly about it. It makes me blush when you quote my writing lol (///w///)
Hmm... there are still a few chapters left, and I want to have my fun with this for as long as I can haha! Oh? Having second thoughts I see... This fic does require you have an open mind to ships so I'm glad to hear you do. I like an element of surprise here and there.
Thanks for reading and commenting~!
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I loved this chapter. The date is so sweet! Finally Masaki managed to meet hia admirer, even if in a very strange and particular way. He finally knew that Anon really exists. The fact that Aiba was so excited at the thought of being able to be near him, even with his eyes closed, it means his feelings towards Anon grew up inside him.
And Anon, who found the courage to ask him for a date and then "show" himself to him. Despite having his reasons to be anonymous, which I hope sooner or later we will find out, he took the risk to show to Aiba that he's real.
I'm also wondering what happened to Nino. he has disappeared, and this long silence is starting to be a little alarming.
Can't wait for next chapter, as usual :)
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I'm glad you enjoyed! Indeed, a much waited encounter has happened, perhaps not in the way most expected ^^ but still special. It does feel like Aiba's feelings are growing and Anon's character is certainly facing a change of his own. What other thing will it make him overcome in the future, we still don't know!
Nino seems to be missing indeed...
Thanks for reading and commenting~! New chapter very soon.
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I noticed you read this all in one go, thanks (^-^)v <3 !!
Thanks for reading and commenting~!
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Everything Anon does to Aiba is so sweet <3 and I love the fact that Aiba seems comfortable with him even with all the confused feeling he had towards him, anddd they are kissing <333 Damn Anon who are you?!!
Thank you as always for sharing!
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Thanks for reading and commenting~!
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I'm so looking forward to the next chapter, you have me crazy over this. Too many questions that have no answer for now and my mind hates that but I can't deny that I'm enjoying as well...damn such guilty pleasure *wink*
Thank you so much for writing such a beautiful fic!
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You made me blush while reading this. You even read it all in one go (//w//) You're support means a lot. Thank you and I hope I can keep you entertained for the rest of it as well~
Thanks for reading and commenting~!